The Challenges of Adult Dating
As you get older, there are more variables that come into play when looking for a significant other. Differences in personal vales, financial disparities, and so on. Things that obviously seem less pronounced when you are younger. Of course, some of these things are dependent on your location. Some areas tend to do things differently than others, and it just depends on where you are. In this article I would like to take a look at some of the challenges of adult dating.
Differences in Personal Values
When it comes to dating, and life in general, different people have different desires. Some people are looking for something specific such as starting a family, finding a long term partner, and “settling down”, others are more willing to go with the flow, feel things out, and take things as they go along. Some people may have the desire to travel and see the world, others may be looking to get set up where they currently are.
The location that you are currently living in can in some ways dictate your ability to find what you are looking for. A single person living in a city like Miami or NYC is going to have a different experience than a single person living out in the country. In some areas, people are more prone to lean toward traditional ways of doing things. Following traditional guidelines of marriage, buying homes, and having children. Although there is nothing wrong with this approach, it’s obviously not for everybody. As you get older, these differences in personal values start to become more apparent, which can in some cases make things more challenging.
Financial Disparities
The adult world tends to work differently than the high school/college world. As a younger person, finances tend to be less thought about in dating scenarios. Unless you are at one far side of the spectrum, such as being extremely rich or extremely poor, in most cases it can be almost obsolete. As you get older, that can start to change.
In some instances there may be adult children that still live at home with parents for financial reasons. In other cases it might just not make sense to pursue someone if their personal finance goals don’t align with yours. They might be a great person, but if they are prone to poor spending habits and don’t have the drive to earn and perform at a high level, they most likely will not make a good relationship candidate.
Things like credit score, debt level, and current living situation can become more of a factor. In other cases a person might already have one or more dependents that they are taking care of, and this is something you have to take into account before willingly getting involved with them.
Differences in Career Goals
As an entrepreneurially minded person, you may find yourself leaning toward finding someone that has similar aspirations. Someone that can add to what you are currently building, and someone that is interested in collaboration, partnership, and strategic growth. However, not everyone does things the same way. On the other side, someone that has a strong focus on job security, career structure, and career longevity may not be interested in someone that is playing the “long game” from an entrepreneurial standpoint. Chances are they are going to want someone that has a stable income, set schedule, and secure job.
The more oriented a person is toward traditional values, the more likely they are to look for someone that has a good job and a reasonably high salary. Job status can also play a part in this as well. Having a sophisticated job title. Belonging to a good company. These things are more important to some than others. Nonetheless, they are still factors that can play a part into adult dating.
The last component worth mentioning is social media. Some people are going to be more gravitated toward someone that has a high social media profile. Someone with a lot of followers. Someone that is going to look good to be associated with online. This isn’t a negative thing in all cases. There are plenty of people who are able to incorporate social media as a part of their relationship, and in some instances it can seem to bring people closer together. But, it still plays a part of adult dating, and it is something to keep in mind. As I’m getting older I’m starting to realize on a personal level that the less social media is involved, the more it’s probably better.
Final Thoughts
The less dependent you are on having a relationship at a young age, the easier things are probably going to be for you. It’s the ones that become overly desperate that end up taking on bad baggage, making poor decisions, and doing things to negatively impact their future.
The more focused you are on your personal finances, career, and personal evolution, the easier it’s going to be to roll with the punches and stay focused. The decisions you make will come from a place of centered focus and self awareness. You’ll be less likely to jump on board for poor dating situations, and less likely to produce poor outcomes. Dating can still be incorporated into what you do, but it won’t be the sole focus of your existence. It will play a part of a bigger picture, and serve to aid in the fulfillment of bigger goals.
Thank You For Reading
Thank you for taking the time to read this article. I hope it has served you well, and as always, I look forward to seeing you on the next one.
